Saturday, December 6, 2008


**pulls out a fresh tissue, dunno why**

The big kids had their bbq party tonight. It was entertaining.

I spent the day putting up the christmas lights in the arbors, shopping for pretty things like cable ties and bungy cords and playing taxi all over the place. H had invited the Sperm Donor and SD (who admits he forgot it was on until she rang him this afternoon) brought his latest piece with him, enough alcohol to sustain them (including a bottle of wine with one glassful left in it, which she promptly dispatched) but no food. Well not so much the latest, it's the same piece he had his paws all over in the restaurant way back in July, after splitting with his other piece, that he got back with not long afterwards, who he isn't with now and is back with the Buffet Bird again.

Confused? Not as confused as BB, all liquored up as she was. They sat at the picnic table and he stroked her arse (I kid you not, Ads was gob-smacked, so blatant was he in front of all the kids), touched her every 3.27 seconds (average, the kids compared notes afterwards) and played a little game of "I'm the Man, I can still pull a bird, see, even if my 2 previous wives kicked me to the kerb) and at one point wandered inside (he wasn't completely sober when they arrived, either) and said he hoped I didn't mind him bringing her, but she was already at his house *rolls eyes*, so I said "I don't care, but stop stroking her arse, ok? it's not on".

Ads snorted and left the kitchen for a minute.

When I finally sat down to eat, I sat next to her but they were so engrossed in talking animatedly about who owned what furniture and appliances in his flat and how could his roomie not own hardly anything and that everything in her house was hers and he said it didn't matter where he lived as long as he could get to work and somewhere rural was ok... on and on and on in what sounded like a prep list for them moving in together... I thought "cool, I don't have to make conversation, I can talk to all the kids instead!".

So I did and it was much more fun chatting with teens than him, anyway. It always is.

Then Sequel and I went upstairs to finish sealing the new seams on the repaired top balcony with No More Nails and the flooring stuff that's up there and she said she knew BB from work and she is an alcoholic. The kids had already figured that out.

It was not long after that that I stepped in the patch of NMN and glued my toes together...


Flattie said...

Next time the pair of them come round, use the nmn on them. Sounds like they deserve each other. Its good shit innit ? I used it to fix a broken planter that Herself picked up real cheap.

Morticia said...

Next time? NEXT TIME??

And here was me thinking you liked me...